  Stand witness as Featured MIDI: Gorillaz - Clint Eastwood |
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MY EGO!!! GAAAAAHHH!!! It was bound to happen sooner or later. My ego has grown to such a universal size that I have turned schizophrenic. Well, I guess I'll interview myself to know stuff about me.
Jeffrey Faden: Let's start things off with the simple questions. What season are you, JeffreyAtW?
JeffreyAtW: ...Winter.
Faden: What is the deal with Sleek Spum? How did you think him up?
AtW: (giggles uncontrollably) Why does everyone make such a big deal with Sleek Spum? (laughs) My stupid friends (smiles) thought up of a dumb name for a karate fighter. (fidgets) This was in sixth grade. (blinks) I (blinks) thought it was (blinks) a funny na(blinks)me, so I (burps) decided to use it (blinks) for something. (condemns parentheses to the FIERY PITS OF HELL) At that time, Serpent231 was into online wrestling, by text roleplaying. I decided to make fun of the people who really didn't know how to, and the rest was history.
Faden: Does Sleek Spum have any coincidental traits of Jeff K.?
AtW: WHO TOLD YOU THAT!?
Faden: How did you think of such a website as the Midgar Swamp?
AtW: Well, I decided one day to make an RPG website, and add a humorous twist to it. I called it the "Elw Dimension." After a few weeks, it got hacked by a guy named Fritz Fraundorf. I changed the password for the site, though, and so he opened up Cosmo Canyon. I contributed to the site under the names of Matt32, YelseyKing, and SinclairC. Later, when Fritz finally got tired of his unoriginal content (all from me), I retorted and opened up the Midgar Swamp. Serpent231 deleted my first crucial updates and proved to the world that HE opened it up, and he let me join as a secondary staff member. Well, I showed him. Now he barely updates, and when he does, NO ONE CARES!!!
Faden: Where did you grow the balls to come up with something as deathly evil as that?
AtW: I don't believe in evil. And dem balls is genetic.
Faden: Whut duz atw stand 4?
AtW: ...
Faden: Why did you begin to compose MIDIs?
AtW: Before the MP3 craze, MIDIs were crucial for some quick listening. For anyone who liked just the tunes of songs, MIDIs were the answer.
(fade to old black and white photographs scrolling across the screen)
AtW: Hey, cut that out! This isn't "Biography!" Anyway, after years of wondering "how DO they do that," Serpent231 found me NoteWorthy Composer. With this tool, I felt like I could do anything. I jumped off many a building with the freedom I was given. I began sequencing pop songs like "Baby One More Time" and "One Week," and I as hailed as the best sequencer of all time by myself.
Faden: Aw, shucks. Don't rub it in.
AtW: Then I started composing video game MIDIs and I got even more fans (2). Then after all the varieties I had listened to in my MIDI history, I decided to go out there and make my OWN music. Bye bye, popularity. Don't go down that road. You hear?
Faden: Loud and clear, JeffreyAtW, loud and clear. Now, for more personal questions.
AtW: (removes pants)
Faden: Do you have any friends?
AtW: Are you my friend?
Faden: No.
AtW: (thinks) Think, think, think. (thinks) Oh yeah. There's Serpent231. He's a friend.
Faden: HA! Is that the best you can do?
AtW: Think, think, think. Where did I leave my hunny jar? Think, think, think. Well, there is Eric, Max, Aaron, Chris, Sam, another Chris, another Chris, [name withheld], Jeff, Arthur, Steve, another Eric, John, Ted, David, another Max, another David, Bob, Rob, Bert, and Captain Winkey.
Faden: You made those names up.
AtW: Every single one. Except-- uh, yep, every single one.
Faden: What dos aTW stnad for?
AtW: ...
Faden: Do I make you horny? Do I?
AtW: C'mere, you.
Faden: What do you want to be when you grow up?
AtW: Just like you, Mr. Faden, just like you.
Faden: WHAT DOES ATW STNAD FOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AtW: ...
Faden: What is your Innate Color?
AtW: White.
Faden: What's your sign?
AtW: Capricorn.
Faden: What religion are you?
AtW: Reform Jewish.
Faden: What's your saint's day?
AtW: November 8.
Faden: What's your social security number, credit card number, and ATM password?
AtW: Nice try.
Faden: Well, thank you, JeffreyAtW. This has been an informative interview, and I wish the best for you and your pants.
AtW: If you care so much about what's in my pants, why don't you take monthly visits?
Faden: I'll be sure to do that.
AtW: This is stupid.
Faden: Yeah. One more thing before I go. what dos AtW stand four
AtW: ...